my landlord lied about the 'full kitchen'

fresh squeezed OJ at brunch. watched the waiter pour tropicana from behind the bar.

the packaging required scissors. I didn't have scissors. my hands now have opinions.

oatmeal that looks gourmet on the menu arrives looking like it was already eaten once

avocados are rock hard for 5 days and then completely black inside on day 6. every time.