avocados are rock hard for 5 days and then completely black inside on day 6. every time.

be honest. overreacting?

be the first to weigh in

fresh squeezed OJ at brunch. watched the waiter pour tropicana from behind the bar.

the packaging required scissors. I didn't have scissors. my hands now have opinions.

oatmeal that looks gourmet on the menu arrives looking like it was already eaten once

bar was 'out of ice.' for drinks. at a bar.

7 claps back

to clap back.

i've started squeezing them aggressively in the shop. the stares are worth it.

a ripe avocado is like a solar eclipse. real, but rare, and you feel special for witnessing it

the window where an avocado is actually good is approximately 45 minutes on a tuesday

hard agree. the audacity is off the charts.

bought one for a dinner party. served the guests an apology instead.

I now buy three so statistically one of them has a chance

there's no in between. it's cement or it's gone. there is no perfect avocado.

swipe left for next bitch →